I’m not sure I’ve ever mentioned this but for fun, I write t..

I’m not sure I’ve ever mentioned this but for fun, I write to people serving life-term p r I s o n sentences (and send them books). I was already a true crime junkie pretty much, binging on YouTube channels like The Chapter and Jim Can’t Swim, but one day I thought about loneliness of the level some people in prison face. Even though the crime is heinous (I’m not one of those attracted to criminals), I justbdon’t think a person who had thousands of decisions in their life time should be judged penultimately by their worst one. I can actually understand their thought process in the act itself and can see how certain situations bring people to do pretty terrible things. It is indeed true that a convicted murderer (his own family of all people, but we should know, our family can hurt us the most, they know our weaknesses and knows how to cause us the most pain). No one should act self-righteous as if they weren’t capable of something like that, in reality, we all have the potential to be murderers and saints. I can explain more about how p r I s o n e r s get money if you’re interested. For the chess player, he slid in my dms first so you all are talking to a pretty popular chick ;-) The lie is I don’t have BPD (borderline personality disorder). I don’t fear abandonment, I prefer being alone most of the time anyways. I don’t feel enough emotions to have any emotional instability. I don’t really feel anything on a regular basis. I either feel content or disappointed but it doesn’t affect my mood in any noticeable way. I’m not happy but I’m also not sad. I just always feel neutral. There are rare circumstances where I do feel emotions such as anger. I enjoyed the internal rage because it made me feel alive, I truly felt something. I feel like a straight line, with no bumps going either direction. It wasn’t always this way but it slowly made its way as the primary mode of thinking and feeling / er lack of feeling. I feel people assume I have BPD because it’s primarily a female mental illness or because I have self harm scars. I only was diagnosed with OCD, depression, and ADHD. 🌟 I also have an amazon wishlist https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/6UTP3XC64BHW?ref_=wl_share